This time of year marks the halfway point in my term of service, and to commemorate that we were given letters that we wrote to ourselves during orientation. I was pretty skeptical about the whole activity, mostly because it reminded me of things like new years resolutions where you set goals for yourself that you are inevitably going to struggle to keep up with. Having those goals and hopes in writing, I figured, would only make me feel worse if they weren't followed through on. In some ways, that is true, but in other ways, this letter has served as a good reminder of the things I find important. If it isn't abundantly clear, I really hate January, and I have a really difficult time during this month to stay motivated, optimistic, or productive. I'm going to try to use these excerpts from my letter to get myself back on my feet and start February feeling strong, confident, and empowered.
The whole point of this letter is to capture the optimism and energy of orientation to be looked at in 6 months- probably when we're heading towards burn out. To be honest, I'm not really feeling the positivity at the moment, so I'm sorry if this might not be the type of letter you might want or need right now.
Despite my kind of "meh" mood at the moment, I have a lot to be proud of. I've gotten good at articulating what I want and going for it. I've done quite a few things in the last couple of weeks that have involved making myself quite vulturable- and I've made it through each one mostly unscathed. I hope that when I read this in the future, I am still doing these things because I really think it helps me be my authentic self as much as possible.
I hope I've made a name for myself in this organization. I know that I have a lot of insight and dedication to give and I am ready to really show that to everyone I serve with.
I hope you still love your job. I hope you are more firm with your students and that they are succeeding because of that. I hope that team Harding still takes time out of the day to have fun, and that despite everything, you're still not ready to leave on friday afternoons. Mostly, I hope you feel empowered, trusted, and loved in every area of your life, and if you don't, that you are working to change it.
Hang in there,